How to talk to your family about your final wishes. 

Talking to your family about your funeral plans may seem like a challenging and daunting task, but it's an important conversation to have. Not only will it help your family know and carry out your final wishes, but it can also prepare them and alleviate some of the stress and uncertainty they may face after your passing.

Here are some tips for having a productive and meaningful conversation with your family about your funeral plans and final wishes.

How to start the conversation.

First think about who you want to be involved in the conversation. It could just be you and your significant other, or maybe your children, immediate family, or a close friend.

Plan ahead and think about what points you want to cover. This can be quite an emotional conversation, as most of us don’t like to think about what will happen when our loved ones are no longer alive, so being prepared can help keep the conversation on track.

Think about how to approach the conversation. You might mention a friend or loved one who recently passed and how it got you thinking about what your own funeral will look like. 

Have the conversation early.

It's never too early to start thinking about end-of-life planning, including funeral planning. By starting the conversation early, you can give yourself and your loved ones time to consider your options and make informed decisions.

Starting early also means there is no time pressure to make decisions or rush into an option you and your family don’t agree on.

Be clear and specific about your wishes. 

It's important to be clear and specific about your funeral wishes, including whether you want a traditional funeral or a more alternative celebration of life. You should also consider whether you want to be buried or cremated, and if you have any specific requests for your funeral or memorial service, such as music or readings.

In addition to your funeral plans, you may also want to discuss your final wishes, such as what you would like to happen to your personal belongings or any charitable donations you would like to make.The first thing that will help you get the send-off you really want is actually talking to your family about what type of funeral you want for when the time comes.

We know it’s an awkward conversation to have, but it doesn’t have to be! Just a couple of open, casual conversations with your children about what you want for a memorial service will help them so much when they do have to face the reality of your passing.

It's important to be clear and specific about your funeral wishes, including whether you want a traditional funeral or a more alternative celebration of life. You should also consider whether you want to be buried or cremated, and if you have any specific requests for your funeral or memorial service, such as music or readings.

In addition to your funeral plans, you may also want to discuss your final wishes, such as what you would like to happen to your personal belongings or any charitable donations you would like to make.

Consider your family's needs and feelings.

While it's important to express your wishes, it's also important to consider your family's needs and feelings. Your family may have their own ideas about your funeral and memorial service, and it's important to listen to their thoughts and incorporate them into your plans where possible. After all, they will be the ones attending the funeral, not you.

Write down your plans. 

It's important to make your funeral plans known to your loved ones so that they are prepared for your passing and can carry out your final wishes. You can do this by writing down your wishes in a document, such as a living will or advance directive, or by discussing your plans with a trusted family member or friend who can ensure that your wishes are carried out.

Here are some ideas that might help.

The Eulogy: Why not write your own eulogy? That way you get to tell your life story in your own words. You would be amazed how little your children know about what you did in your prime years, or how you fell in love, or what you did when you were a teenager!

You might even want to record yourself telling the stories in your own voice. That way you could include a really personal goodbye to your loved ones! For some tips on writing a eulogy, read the How to write a eulogy: 7 step guide.

As an alternative to writing your own eulogy, you could share your life story as a family history for your grandkids.

If you enjoy scrapbooking, you could make a scrapbook as a present, or ask your family to help you build it. Officeworks and online printers can make picture books easily. Some aged care homes also help residents put together a picture book of their life.

A photo book tells a life’s story and can help with a photo display at a memorial service. It can be a fun project to work on together and may open the door to end-of-life conversations.

Music: Choose three or four songs to play at your funeral or memorial – one for the start, one for the end, and one (or two) for the photos in the middle. For some ideas, take a look at this Songs for funerals and memorial services list.

Tributes: Write down who you would like to speak at your service. Then send them an email saying you want them to talk at your funeral or memorial. It is also important to tell them how long you want them to speak for.

Location: Write down where you would like the funeral or memorial service to be. And maybe think of a back-up location in case that one is not available when you need it.

Consider pre-planning your funeral. 

Pre-planning your funeral can take some of the burden off of your loved ones and ensure that your final wishes are carried out. Pre-planning involves making arrangements for your funeral or memorial service in advance, like organising a Prepaid Funeral.

This will also alleviate any financial pressure on your loved ones, so in their grief they are not also stressing about paying for a funeral. By prepaying your funeral, you’re also locking in today’s prices, so you beat out on the inflation, whether you’ll need the service in one year, five, or fifteen.  

Make sure your family knows where to find important documents. 

It can be helpful to have all of your important documents, such as your Will, insurance policies, and funeral plans, in one place where your family can easily access them. Make sure to let your family know where these documents are located and how to access them.

A difficult but important conversation.

By having a thoughtful and open conversation with your family about your funeral plans, you can help ensure that your final wishes are carried out and that your loved ones are prepared for your passing. End-of-life planning, including funeral planning, is a necessary and important aspect of taking care of yourself and your loved ones.

The conversation also helps remove some of the fears and anxieties we get around death. For many of us, that fear includes leaving our loved ones behind and not knowing if they’ll be okay. Sharing your thoughts and fears can help demystify and empower your love ones to make decisions on your behalf.

If you’re interested in a Bare Prepaid Funeral, you can click the link below for an instant quote for your area, or give our incredible Prepaid team a call on 1800 202 901.

Disclaimer: This article provides general information only and does not constitute professional advice. Please consult a qualified expert for guidance specific to your situation.